Friends, That Are Not Forever

How much a person comes to depend upon friendship in a lifetime is beyond comprehension to ordinary thought. As author Massimo Pigliucci says of Aristotle, ‘Aristotle’s opinion was that friends hold a mirror up to each other; through that mirror they can see each other in ways that would not otherwise be accessible to them, and it is this (reciprocal) mirroring that helps them improve themselves as persons. Friends, then, share a similar concept of eudaimonia [Greek for “having a good demon] and help each other achieve it. So it is not just that friends are instrumentally good because they enrich our lives, but that they are an integral part of what it means to live the good life.’

Having been witness to some quite exemplary examples of friendship, it is only natural to feel that warmth seep into you and make you want to discover the joy of having to build a relation with a person that’s compatible to you yet again, over and over.

The previous month saw the passing away of one of the most cherished of relatives, leaving an empty place that is but an ode to friendship. What moves on, always, is never any person, or any relation, I think. It’s just the concept that goes on to take a place of secondary importance in our own minds.

I quote Andrew Sullivan from Love Undetectable: Notes on Friendship, Sex and Survival, “You can tell how strong the friendship is by the silence that envelops it. Part of this reticence is reflected in the moments when friendship is appreciated. If friendship rarely articulates itself when it is in full flood, it is often only given its due when it is over, especially if its end is sudden or caused by death. Suddenly, it seems, we have lost something so valuable and profound that we have to make up for our previous neglect and acknowledge it in ways that would have seemed inappropriate before…”

In the recent past, I had this soul awakening, thunderstorm-in-the-mind, eye opening experience, in that order, regarding my own friends. The whole support system that I thought I had turned out to be illusory, and it dawned that different people call out to, and for, different aspects of you. The ones you are friends with the most are not necessarily the ones you get to spend the most time with, and the ones with whom you do indeed share laughter, tears and insecurities with, are not necessarily the ones you want to be with. The people I had, I have them now too, I do. They are good people, just people who do not see things as I do; or the plain truth, people who are not in a symbiotic relation with friends. Free spirits, in other words!

Friends of family, friends since school, friends, that are family. Blessed are those that have them. Ties, that go deeper than conceptual understanding. People, who reinforce the goodness in people. Ones that stand strong, unswayed by the test of time. It feels wonderful to be a witness to such a bonding. It’s a kind of an anchor – at a time when your own belief systems take a hit.

Note  – The quotes from writers Andrew Sullivan and Massimo Pigliucci are largely courtesy of articles on Brain Pickings, a personal blog by Maria Popova.


Brand new.

What if it wasn’t the 2nd of January, 2015 today but some other day? Perhaps 31st December, 2014?
How different would the perception of the day be? Do we all live our lives so purposefully as to make each day count?
With the turn of a year, we celebrate new beginnings, renew our hopes, set or re-set our goals, and more importantly, look forward towards the future. But while looking ahead, do we also create a present that’s worthy enough of the future?
New year wishes are exchanged like crazy, with what the social media being on an all-time high. In the virtual world, are real relations retained? Worked upon?
There are hundreds for whom a new year would simply mean another year of survival. I pray that they get a fair shot at living this time around…
Given the number of terror attacks and diseases (global and otherwise) that marked 2014, it is a reassuring thought to think of the families of victims and survivors moving ahead in the direction of peace with the positive aim of forgiveness. I wish for them, strength.
I wish for all of us that we get more sensitive about the things happening around us, and give in to bringing about a positive change.
I wish that love prospers.

Song of the Heart

(P.S. This be one of my 1st attempts at poetry writing. All the poets and non-poets alike, please pardon me!)

So softly did the river flow,

Smooth, in its unwavering path…

So silently did the wind blow,

Unruffled, through the meadows below…

It was a song that came out of his heart

Lyrical, carefree, but with a tinge of gloom.

It spoke of the battles of a lovelorn heart,

It spoke about the Vikings of the past,

It sang about the willowy fields yonder,

It dreamed of a surreal past…

Long forgotten tales,

Of dedication, sacrifice, love,

It sang to the boy,

Making him smile,

Through tears of joy.

As he looked yonder,

At the beauty ahead,

The willowy fields, the muttering trees

A falcon mounted up in the sky,

Its eyes telling tales of joy

Now all was fun, now all was glee,

Even though the wind blew silently.

To the boy’s heart it sung a song,

A tale of love, a tale of life.

Welcome 2014!

With 2013 deciding to come to an abrupt end, there’s little left to do except wait in anticipation and hope for what the new year might bring. It is that time of the year again when graces are said, the Almighty lord is thanked for all things good, when every passenger on this mystery trip takes all things good and bad in his stride, and marches on.

It is that time of the year again wishes of peace and prosperity are sought; and the promise of a rich and colourful morrow fills up the gladdened heart.

There are going to be people for whom the year might have passed far too quickly – people like me – who’d look longingly at the year that has slipped by. And there are going to be those for whom 2013 lived upto its promises; those having lived in all moments of ’13, await expectantly the winds and the tides that this year, fresh and crisp, would bring.

All said, there’s no denying that 2013 was a special year; a year of redemption, of hope, of despair, of longing, of joy, of gut-wrenching emotions, and above all foraging new relations. Whether 2014 is to be a year of broken resolutions or new inspirations (not to forget yummy, melt-in-the-mouth cookies!), only time will tell, but while into it, make sure you enjoy the ride!

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